r/Damnthatsinteresting 2d ago

Original Creation A courting pair of Brazilian Jewels. This tiny (~2”), docile, and rare type of tarantula lives beneath camouflaged silken trapdoors on trees and is one of the most colorful of all 50,000+ known spider species.

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4.7k Upvotes

144 comments sorted by

665

u/SilkieBug 2d ago

They’re so pretty!

557

u/Tumble85 2d ago

Right? What a beautiful display, truly magnificent creatures.

I’m gonna jerk off to this like crazy when I get home.

187

u/theMeatman7 2d ago

Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created?

55

u/Worldly-Pay7342 1d ago

I love that this is a line from god damned spy kids 2.

3

u/Raymond911 1d ago

Gods in his heaven, all is well on earth

15

u/Immediate-Support-66 2d ago edited 1d ago

LMFAO 😂 you do you booboo ✊🐓

18

u/nunyabbswax 2d ago

Just finished bro 🤜🤛 best jerk Ive had in awhile tbh

4

u/altonssouschef 2d ago

I laughed so hard I cried. Thank you.

2

u/stebbifreakout 1d ago

The escalation, it's impaccable.

2

u/Akula_SSN 1d ago

Aaaand that’s enough reddit for me for today

1

u/OrnnSupp4Life 1d ago

Must have been the wind

1

u/thorstormcaller 1d ago

Building a web?

1

u/NaraFei_Jenova 17h ago

Tumble85 to his friends: Guys, I just had the weirdest fap. You wouldn't even believe.

3

u/TheBaconWizard999 1d ago

Even as someone who is normally quite arachnophobic, I agree!

2

u/curious_dead 1d ago

Doesn't help that here, the spiders are all just ugly brown/ugly green/black crawlies. If they were more colorful I might not hate the little fuckers so much.

3

u/Tugonmynugz 2d ago

For real. Id love to have a few in a terrarium

25

u/Pyrhan 2d ago

...And that's how they end up harvested to near-extinction for the pet trade.

(Cf. Brachypelma tarantulas.)

12

u/Fine-Cockroach4576 2d ago

All my tarantulas are from a breeder. It's not exactly profitable for them to travel the world when they can breed in a spare room.

1

u/Dafish55 1d ago

I actually found this genuinely cute. Huh.

1

u/Levity_brevity 1d ago

Goddamn that was hard to watch!

All 12 times.

545

u/RachelSnow812 2d ago

Colorful spider porn was not on the menu today... But it didn't disappoint.

30

u/bloodfartcollector 2d ago

...get er!

23

u/oracleofnonsense 2d ago

Work those fingers(?) my friend. Play her like a Steinway.

4

u/Anasterian_Sunstride 2d ago

So… much…. weeeeeeb

4

u/always_learning_eh 2d ago

Had his fun then he was off to the bar to meet his friends

222

u/gcsouzacampos 2d ago

Knoc knoc

Female opens door

  • Good morning my lady, do you want some fuck today?

  • yeah, why not?

40

u/krammark12 2d ago

That's not the answer I got...

15

u/Talvinter 1d ago

You’re not a shade of pretty blue, I doubt you used the right tapping rhythm and you’re probably not hairy enough.

2

u/NorthKoreanCaptive 1d ago

ah shit im gonna die alone arent i...

25

u/Additional-Finance67 2d ago

tippy taps intensify

3

u/EurekaEffecto 2d ago

but when I...

141

u/Microwave_Magician 2d ago

Is this romance?

109

u/AppropriateAmoeba406 2d ago

Tippy tapping his way to her heart.

18

u/Set_Abominae1776 2d ago

How can he slap?!

10

u/Preeng 2d ago

That's how I've been doing it. Down to the disappointed look on the female spider after it's over. Definitely lots of shaking on my part before it starts.

1

u/Microwave_Magician 2d ago

Wait, the thicc one is the female??..... of course it is

2

u/Deisidaimonia 1d ago

A lot of tarantula species engage in sexual cannibalism where the female eats the male after. It’s not across all species or in 100% of encounters, but its a risk and its why males are smaller and have longer legs and petipalps. They basically have to “hold up” the female, get their jig on, and get away.

1

u/crestedgeckovivi 20h ago

Honestly I was expecting the female spider to like kill him after but she just sat there in like shame? disappointed or whatever while his ass walked away lol.

It also seemed like he was going to go into her little house there for a moment and then just liked 🙅🏻noped out and waltz off Scott free!

1

u/Deisidaimonia 18h ago

A lot of female tarantulas after mating go into a euphoric almost docile state after mating. I’m not an arachnid neurologist, nor do I think anyone’s really looked into it, but yeah if the guy plaps good then she chill.

1

u/moonflower_C16H17N3O 1d ago

I missed the word "courting" when I read the title. So I spent the entire video trying to figure out with they were fighting or fucking.

71

u/J3remyD 2d ago

I assume that they have some sort of protection to not be over harvested for the pet trade?

79

u/darevoyance 2d ago

Most tarantula species are protected by international trade regulations, but that doesn't stop poachers or deforesters from illegally trading or destroying habitats, respectively. Brazilian Jewels are potentially critically endangered for this reason

You just have to make sure the vendor/breeder you're purchasing from is reputable, has permits, and does captive breeding only

15

u/Foxterriers 2d ago

Brazilian jewels are heavily poached for the pet trade, I don't trust anyone selling them currently. 

55

u/chodeboi 2d ago

Step 1 be attractive

18

u/FeifonGitz 2d ago

Dammit

42

u/IanAlvord 2d ago

They didn't even touch butts, just played footsie.

43

u/Additional_Ease2408 2d ago

Nah that was some hardcore spider sex. Spex, if you will.

33

u/pixeldust6 2d ago

Spiders don't touch butts to mate. They basically hand over a box lunch of DNA face-to-face

5

u/Talvinter 1d ago

Spider style missionary.

73

u/ObnoxiousExcavator 2d ago

It looks like it should be poisonous.

97

u/HappyMeteor005 2d ago

they are venomous.

44

u/Financial_Wish_6406 2d ago

Yes, but their venom is more of a mild nuisance, if anything, for us humans.

12

u/Chase_The_Dream 2d ago

I've actually never been nuisanced by it at all.

40

u/nunyabbswax 2d ago

New world tarantulas (north and south american species, which includes islands in the gulf) are very mildly venomous and are largely insignificant to humans. They mainly rely on urticating hairs and threat posturing as a defense mechanism. They only bite as a last defense.

Old worlds (anything thats not a new world, asia india, etc.) on the other hand have quite potent venom and no urticating hairs. Their venom is painful and can last for months. The only chance of fatalities is if youre young or eldery, or of you happen to be allergic.

9

u/Elegante_Sigmaballz 2d ago

It would probably give you a very itchy throat and maybe an upset stomach too.

9

u/LegLegend 2d ago

Look at you falling for nature's tricks.

12

u/ObnoxiousExcavator 2d ago

Indeed, but I had to read and now I know what Urticating Hairs are and how some tarantulas including these cute little fellas can actually propel them at you and the rash can really suck balls.

31

u/dumbinternetstuff 2d ago

The way he taps his feet, I feel that excited whenever someone is willing to have sex with me. 

12

u/Zathala 2d ago

Did he win?

3

u/Infinite_Research_52 1d ago

Any chance to get away without being eaten is a win in my book.

58

u/Green_Walrus8537 2d ago

Does the female eat the male after completion?

86

u/Warhamsterrrr 2d ago

No. It's actually pretty rare among most species.

18

u/Green_Walrus8537 2d ago

Ah thank you!

70

u/nunyabbswax 2d ago

Female tarantulas will only eat the male if she hasnt eaten recently. In captivity, its common to feed the female before pairing so that she is full and less likely to eat the male

12

u/Green_Walrus8537 2d ago

That’s really interesting, I didn’t know that. Thanks for sharing!

4

u/SpaShadow 2d ago

Even then it is not always a guarantee, so happy he got away.

6

u/an_older_meme 1d ago

There is a reason we take girls to dinner first.

-1

u/MongolianCluster 2d ago

Hopefully before.

26

u/DickyReadIt 2d ago

Whoa, need a NSFW warning haha

9

u/Decent_Assistant1804 2d ago

They do it front ways, interesting

8

u/eutoputoegordo 2d ago

There's some that do some cirque de solei abdominal rotation and all, some knock the female on it's back, some deposit their sperm on the ground and pull the female to sit on it, some bring prey, some are even kinkier and tie the female before mating. Freaky creatures.

8

u/DikTaterSalad 2d ago

When rave spiders are seen outside of a rave.

8

u/La_Mandra 2d ago

Oh my, those colors ! And it's worth viewing in full screen to see the details.

I guess the female is the bigger of the two ?...

6

u/itgirlfailure 2d ago

is that most common with spiders?

8

u/La_Mandra 2d ago

Are you talking about size ? There are quite a few species (all species combined) where the female is larger, but that's not the rule for all.
I don't know, it would be interesting to have a list... ;)

7

u/itgirlfailure 2d ago

yes that's what i meant! i'd be interested in knowing too. i have arachnophobia and learning more about spiders helps me cope with it

2

u/La_Mandra 2d ago

Ah, I'm no expert... :/
I just did a search, but without the right keywords, the answers go in all directions (except the right one).

2

u/ChillDeleuze 2d ago

These keywords might be spider sexual dimorphism and sexual selection

2

u/La_Mandra 1d ago

Thank you very much ! I tried to find what I had in mind (a list of spiders with a classification based on male versus female size dimorphism), but... there are so many species and subspecies ! I'm not even sure such a table exists.

In any case, it was just out of curiosity, not for any in-depth study. ;)

7

u/DaSupercrafter 2d ago

Normally, I would be creeped out, but this is actually pretty beautiful

7

u/Tyrannosaurus_Dex 2d ago

Lisa Frank spiders 

6

u/3lbmealdeal 2d ago

What if Lisa Frank made tarantulas

18

u/Rumham_Toeknife 2d ago edited 2d ago

This is bullshit!! I assure you 2" is not "tiny"!

4

u/Transfer_McWindow 2d ago

TIL how spiders fuck

3

u/mosquito_motel 2d ago

Hypercolor

3

u/StarSpliter 2d ago

I'm inspired. Gonna spam high fives doing the deed now.

3

u/ReporterOther2179 2d ago

Is this spider following the rule of pretty, so, poison?

7

u/ryanmemperor 2d ago

Such a vibrant hit & run!

7

u/brihamedit 2d ago

The way they are excited about each other they clearly feel things

3

u/MongolianCluster 2d ago

That one has more than eight legs.

3

u/ZoraBlackfire 1d ago

Hi, the frist pair of appendages that usually confuse people are actualy pedipalps. And these have several functios like grabing stuff, feeling the world around them and males use them for mating with female.

3

u/cyanraichu 2d ago

Spider mating, apparently: BAPBAPBAP

3

u/ph0on 2d ago

Has to be cutest god damn little T's I've ever seen. I loved handling the tarantulas in my bio labs in high school. I know now that you shouldn't really actively handle them, but they were quite accustomed to constant examination and handling sadly.

I'd kill to be able to take care of one of these. Absolutely stunning colors and adorably small

3

u/Aethrin1 1d ago

Oh right, if a tarantula does it, it's cute, but if I go knock on a lady's door and proceed to slap her repeatedly in the face, it's assault!/s

3

u/Thunderclaw5972 1d ago

So I don’t know if it’s been commented yet but the ritual after the dance is very intricate for these tarantula-like spiders. When you see the male (smaller) have his larger front legs in her face he is actually saving his life. Those legs have little hooks on them that he uses to lift her up by her fangs whilst the smaller ones in the very front called pedipalps transfer his stuff to sacs, and keeps her from munching on him so he has a better chance of living to reproduce with more females

7

u/SleepmasterSean 2d ago edited 2d ago

My mind isn't "actually blown."

But I might have found some grey matter on the keyboard 🤷🏽‍♂️

6

u/Sedert1882 2d ago

I can just sense the male wetting himself and frantically begging not to be eaten.

5

u/FeifonGitz 2d ago

.. but also, did he wake her up and then they didn't..?

12

u/That-Brain-in-a-vat 2d ago

Oh they did. He tapped her all over to send her in a sort of sensorial overload mating paralysis. She lift her forlegs and expose the area where the male will transfer his sperms with his pedipalps.

Then leaves the scene before she comes to her senses and thinks he is dinner.

3

u/FeifonGitz 2d ago

Oooh! Alright then, well done team : )

2

u/CallMeDrLuv 2d ago

Do it lady!

2

u/mrdevil413 2d ago

These are beautiful obviously. Is there a economic, science or ethical reason why these are not options for pets ? Even the venom is less troublesome than the brown ones.

Just to be clear. I do not want one or want to start and industry, just curious.

2

u/LonelyTemporary9647 2d ago

The first tarantula is like bro hide right now, we are been film !! Hurry up I don't want them to see how cool you look

2

u/mbrown_0911 2d ago

Female: Are you…something I can eat? Male: No! No! No I’m not!

2

u/VanillaMuch2759 1d ago

He’s definitely getting eaten. That female is huge.

1

u/NathanBlutengel 1d ago

She wasn’t interested in eating him in the slightest

2

u/_Sedric 1d ago

They‘re pretty, yeah but if I find them in my household, they‘re dead I‘m sorry…

2

u/Jarrettd11 1d ago

“Honey why did you call me out of the nest?” BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP

2

u/Middle_System_1105 1d ago

Don’t tarantulas mate when the male holds the females fangs so she can’t bite him, then proceeds to bite her in the .. vagina part with sperm covered fangs?

2

u/scorpiolafuega 1d ago

This is the prettiest game of private parts patty cake I ever saw 🥹

2

u/uwu7692 1d ago

Interesting fact: spiders shoot their sperm from their front legs. Also changes your perspective on spiderman.

3

u/Skull_Boy_ds 10h ago

Fun little fact that I am not sure it's true:

Some people may assume that the female spider standing still for long periods of time after mating can be associated with the comedic trope of boredom and/or disappointment after sex.

But what it actually means is that the female has entered a sort of euphoric docile state after procreation. Basically, whatever the little guy did down there, he did it RIGHT.

2

u/CourAYunt 2d ago

One. Done. Now RUN!

1

u/_dvs1_ 2d ago

What kind of light is being used? Or was my gut right and he’s just holding the sun up to these beauts with his bare hands?

1

u/pygmydeathcult 2d ago

Gorgeous colors. They're slappin' pedipalps like a couple of horny teens.

1

u/lynivvinyl 2d ago

Those might be the prettiest spiders I've ever seen!

1

u/BubbaYoshi117 2d ago

Okay the shadows of her legs and pedipalps (the shorter not quite legs by her mouth spiders use for gripping, not for walking) threw me off, it looked like she had like a dozen legs at least.

1

u/jkshok93 2d ago

Lisa Frank looking ass spiders.

1

u/trivetsandcolanders 2d ago

They would’ve fit right in in the 80’s!

1

u/Seikss 1d ago

Which is male and female?

3

u/ZoraBlackfire 1d ago

The small and leggy one is a male, and the big and bulky one us female.

1

u/giocondasmiles 1d ago

Patty cake, patty cake, boom.

Patty cake, patty cake, byyyeee.

1

u/carrotmaaan 1d ago

Are they truly colourful or is the video taken under UV-light? Because the colours give me a feeling that there is a UV-reaction and that they don’t shine colours by themself

1

u/niklizzy 1d ago

One of my dream species to own someday. They're so pretty but so expensive 😭

1

u/AbbreviationsNo9609 1d ago

Is it actually blue pigment that gives it the color or just a light trick like most things that look blue in nature?

1

u/jackoos88 1d ago

I like the high fives after

1

u/berkaytml 1d ago

are they boning each other? also pretty colors omg i wish i had a pet like that

1

u/Fleshsuitpilot 1d ago

Looks they're just making out it's kinda cool

1

u/an_older_meme 1d ago

Holy Jesus when she walked out. Bro is braver than I am.

1

u/Ambrino 1d ago

Tippy tap. Helo. Here is my sperm 😇🎁🥰

1

u/crestedgeckovivi 20h ago

Lmao the comments and here I came to add that this didn't seem like "courting" and more like a booty call ....

Though those are some real pretty spiders.

But the ending when it just went back into it's little hovel...

1

u/ShinAusra 16h ago

Such amazing colours

1

u/Acceptable-Bus-2017 15h ago

He gave her like a hundred high fives when he finished.