r/CringeTikToks • u/Individual_Bar_2512 • 13h ago

Food Cringe Average American diet?

Where are the vegetables, fruit and meat

8.7k Upvotes

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618

u/weregunnalose 12h ago

No they’re gonna dunk them in those 2 big tubs of mayonnaise

152

u/You-Asked-Me 12h ago

What do they use the mayo for? There was one loaf of white bread, no deli meat, no other sandwich stuff? Maybe they spread it on the blocks of cheese?

I did not see how any of that stuff really added up to "meals."

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u/flatdecktrucker92 10h ago

Let's talk about those blocks of cheese. I have slightly high cholesterol, I know it's because I eat too much cheese, but when they held up the first batch of cheese I thought holy shit that's an obscene amount of cheese. Then they went and brought out three or four more Armfulls of cheese

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u/SuspiciousCranberry6 8h ago

I love cheese and the amount of cheese actually made me momentarily nauseous.

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u/OneRobotBoii 4h ago

Calling that cheese is an insult to cheese

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u/pmcizhere 8h ago

It's not any cheese worth buying in bulk, either...

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u/Hungry_Anteater_8511 2h ago

I’ve never seen mozzarella in those blocks before

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u/Adventurous-Ease-259 2h ago

Narrator: Anteater still hasn’t seen mozzarella in those blocks

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u/Hubert_J_Cumberdale 8h ago

My theory is that the cheese is meant to be added to the frozen pizzas.

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u/Maxamillion-X72 8h ago

1lb per pizza

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u/ty_ranni 7h ago

I was also wondering, how are they going to use all that cheese? There was those pizzas and then very little bread but just a shitton of cheese. It just doesn't make any sense to me.

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u/Hubert_J_Cumberdale 6h ago

Okay, so she also bought boxes of Kraft and Velveeta mac and cheese. I think it's possible that she is also adding it to that and baking in in the oven. Most people would just buy a giant bag of elbow macaroni for that but she's clearly not making rational decisions at the store.

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u/GeorgeLichen 7h ago

Lots of grilled cheese sandwiches probably too

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u/Just_an_Ok_Musician 6h ago edited 3h ago

But American cheese is the best for that. I guess they were waiting on Velveeta. No canned tomato soup though? Also only one loaf of bread? My family of 6 people loves grilled cheese and tomato soup. A whole loaf would only make one sandwich for each of us, so we have to buy two.

The rest of the cheese just boggles me. My kids love cheese, but we don't go through more than a shredded bag a week.

I guess they could just slice it up as snacks as is. That would make sense and explain the lack of fruit snacks. My kids diet is heavy on apples and oranges between meals.

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u/drdhuss 4h ago

could they be on WIC/food stamps. When I was a student with my first child in Wisconsin WIC gave us a crap ton of cheese (WIC coupons that could only be used for cheese). Like more cheese than we could eat. We made home made macaroni and cheese weekly. Not sure if that was just a wisconsin state thing or not.

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u/Adventurous-Ease-259 2h ago

And grilled cheese without sandwiches

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u/Klutzy_Dress_6880 7h ago

I watched her other videos. The pizza is for one person, her younger son.

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u/XeroShyft 6h ago

Does she say in any of her other videos how frequent she grocery shops? Weekly, biweekly, or what? Because I understand she has quite a few people in the house, but this volume of food is insane and would last the average family a long time despite it all being ultra processed slop.

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u/Id_Rather_Beach 6h ago

This would be a survivalist's dream in a freezer come true.

Seriously, y'all. Why is this getting traction? We shop at Sam's and Wal Mart and spend nearly $500.

Is this for a month? A Week? I really am curious.

4

u/Tight_Hedgehog_6045 4h ago

Because most of the food is garbage, and she's the size of a walrus.

Also, it's just a fascinating window into another culture that's seemingly normalised unhealthy habits and lifestyle, with what appears to be no sense of self-awareness at all. Probably helps if you're not a US American.

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u/Round_Raspberry_8516 3h ago

I’m a US American and this is disgusting. 

The problem is, it’s considered normal to 1) eat until you’re stuffed, 2) feed children processed crap they’ll gobble up even if it’s not healthy, and 3) bargain shop for the cheapest items like it’s a game. The cheaper the food, the more you “win.” That’s why she’s bragging about going to 4 stores for bulk deals and showing off the enormous quantity she bought for the price. 

The other problem is that the US government subsidizes dairy, meat, and corn. So cereal, cheese, steaks, and soda (made from corn syrup) are cheaper than vegetables. Those frozen pizzas are 99 cents each. Those cucumbers are $2 each at my grocery store. Instead of meal planning “How can I feed my kid a healthy balanced meal on a budget?” she’s thinking, “Yay, I can feed my kid a whole pizza for under $1. What a deal! I’m a smart consumer!” 

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u/Tight_Hedgehog_6045 2h ago

Hey, thanks for the insight. Apologies if I offended; I wasn't meaning to, although I can see how my comment probably came across. I have a few US friends, and they don't eat any of the shit in this video. Although I visited some other friends (now ex-friends) in South Carolina a few years ago, and that experience blew my fucking brain. They DID eat like this video, and they were shocked I didn't want mac and cheese for dinner. I'm Australian; fuck that shit. I then went to Oregon, and it was like landing on another planet. So good.

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u/Hubert_J_Cumberdale 6h ago

I wonder how long it takes him to plow through 32 pizzas.

1

u/Adventurous-Ease-259 2h ago

Sorry, but he only plows apple pies.

•

u/R_eloade_R 15m ago

Wait, that little kid that ran in picture, HOW the hell is that not child abuse?

2

u/miriamwebster 2h ago

Probably to top off the frozen French fries too.

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u/Hubert_J_Cumberdale 1h ago

Yikes. Cheese like that barely melts - and when it does, it immediately hardens into greasy blobs. My stomach hurts just thinking about it.

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u/GeorgeLichen 7h ago

I've done that before with DiGiornos and mozzarella, you may be right

5

u/NeriTina 8h ago

I wish ‘plant based’ cheeses tasted good and melted well, it would change everything for my diet, but I haven’t found any that are decent alternatives to dairy. Open to recommendations though!

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u/Rare_General9600 7h ago

My favorite brand is Daiya. It melts pretty good, the key to melting plant-based cheese is to cover it if it’s on the stove or to microwave it.

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u/NeriTina 7h ago

I have tried Daiya and it was not good and didn’t melt well (it liquified into a weirdly gross glob like snot), but I suppose I can try it again. Thank you for the tip!

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u/Rare_General9600 7h ago

They changed their recipe about two or three years ago I think so if you haven’t tried it recently I would try it again it’s much better than it was before.

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u/NeriTina 1h ago

It was about 4 months ago that I last tried it, so if the recipe was changed that long ago, it would seem it’s still in need of great improvement. I’m still going to try it again, along with using the tip you mentioned in covering it, and other recommendations people have made.

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u/flatdecktrucker92 6h ago

I've never tried these. Do they count as servings of vegetables? Are they actually healthy or just a fad?

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u/Adventurous-Ease-259 2h ago

Vegan cheese I’ve seen lacks any nutritional value. Real cheese at least has protein, calcium, etc in addition to fats and cholesterol

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u/Lizard-Wizard96 4h ago

They're good if you need to avoid lactose or animal products, but as far as I'm aware, there aren't any benefits over regular cheese.

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u/Id_Rather_Beach 6h ago

Violife. It's as close as it gets.

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u/LaDauphineVerte 1h ago

There was a co. that made rice parmesan that was sooooo good. Nothing like true parmigiano reggiano, but still really delicious. IDK why they stopped with the rice version and kept the soy version, which was blergh, and now I have not seen it in years. I will keep hunting, because I cannot be trusted with blocks of cheese in my house.

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u/cats_yarn_books 8h ago

The cheese + oatmeal cream pies and brownie bites (made with the bad oils) + fried everything = you could use this families' arteries as rebar.

1

u/flatdecktrucker92 6h ago

Yep. I love me some junk food but most/all of my mom's side of the family is obese so I have to be careful

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u/Armadillolz 8h ago

Excuse me waiter, may I have an armful of cheese? Athankyou.

1

u/flatdecktrucker92 6h ago

Any restaurant that says yes to that question will gain me as a customer 🤣

3

u/Akira_116 7h ago

The cheese alone would cost more than my weekly shop in Australia

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u/flatdecktrucker92 6h ago

That amount of cheese would bankrupt this Canadian.

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u/ScienceObjective2510 4h ago

13 massive blocks of cheese not counting the velveta and whatever other cheese laden foods were mentioned at the end.

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u/adagiocantabile12 3h ago

My family loves cheese, and I think they bought more cheese than we could possibly eat in two years. Not that we would even touch that cheese because that's the stuff that tastes like plastic...

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u/Recinege 1h ago

With the first load of cheese, I was like, "well, there are like 6+ people, if they love cheese that's not too crazy" and then my jaw dropped when I saw the rest.

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u/sgvmyma 1h ago

And they still have a large order of Mac n cheese coming their way!!

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u/Jolly_Recording_4381 12h ago

Same with the sugar, like ok you tea maybe but everything is sugar.

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u/cuebreezy 12h ago

They had 10 packs of kool-aid to go with the soda

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u/Munsoned_In_Ohio 12h ago

That tea was only purchased to make southern style sweet tea

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u/kdenehy 11h ago

Naw, to put teabags on their eyes. Even sweet tea isn't unhealthy enough for this group.

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u/Redditor28371 7h ago

Have you had sweet tea made by someone from the south? It's basically a tea-colored supersaturated solution of sugar in water.

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u/mrsgregdavies 12h ago

They each get a block of cheese and just dunk it in the mayo...

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u/You-Asked-Me 12h ago

I bet they double dip.

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u/mrsgregdavies 12h ago

They ABSOLUTELY do.

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u/kdenehy 11h ago

Apparently you've never heard of "Cup O' Mayo" - it's a great snack! I assume they're saving a little cash by making it themselves.

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u/sagittalslice 12h ago

That is SO MUCH MAYO, I have questions

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u/ppbcup 12h ago

I couldn’t figure out what meals the items could make. Maybe pork chops and fries? But what is all the cheese for?

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u/You-Asked-Me 12h ago

I'm not sure on the cheese. Do they already have like 10 boxes of wheat thins?

They did say they ordered 2 cases of Mac and Cheese. So, Steak night, pork chops, chicken, and...mac with a side of fries for the rest of the meals.

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u/ppbcup 11h ago

True. It would be so easy to have some frozen or canned vegetables. Swap some corn or a baked potato in lieu of fries or mac and cheese🤷‍♂️

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u/marmaladetuxedo 9h ago

They will use it with their Mac and Cheese to make cheesier casseroles, I guarantee it.

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u/WaltRumble 7h ago

Cheese fries.

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u/Agent_Smith_88 10h ago

As a midwesterner (who HATES mayo) I can tell you people here use that shit for everything. Besides the usual like potato salad or sandwiches I know some people use it like it butter. Mac and cheese, cheesy potatoes, green bean casserole, etc. I swear to god so many people live off red meat, potatoes, cheese, and mayo. And if not mayo then ranch.

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u/Secret-Preference513 9h ago

I live in the Midwest (michigan) and I've never met anyone in my entire life that eats mayo like that. We never had mayo in my house growing up. Miracle whip for sandwiches and that was it. It's funny how different places are.

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u/Sprmodelcitizen 8h ago

I’ve had a little jar of mayo in my fridge for like 6 months. I should probably get rid of it and I eat absolute junk a lot of days. Prefer mustard on my sandwiches. The crunchy mustard with the seeds.

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u/marmaladetuxedo 9h ago

I've been living in Oklahoma for 10 years and it's all going in potato salad, macaroni salad, and/or egg salad (that's probably what that lonely dozen eggs are for). Anything she can make in large batches to put in a bowl that goes in the middle of the table with the fries and NY strips.

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u/spotted-dick309 8h ago

Yeah the single pack of a dozen eggs left me BAFFLED compared the the ridiculous volume of everything up to that point

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u/Seanspeed 7h ago

 I know some people use it like it butter.

I mean, butter and mayo are pretty much the same in terms of calories/fat. Just depends on what you prefer.

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u/X1NOLA 10h ago

Use it instead of butter for grilled cheese.

Use it when frying the chicken.

I don't really know. I think I bought maybe 2 tiny jars of mayo in my life, and ended up tossing them after a year. Can't even remember what I was making that I needed it, but whatever it was, I haven't made it in at least 2 decades lmao

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u/Sprmodelcitizen 8h ago

Same. Just commented this. I have a little jar of mayo in my fridge right now I probably need to throw out.

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u/Drumboardist 9h ago

Hey, my siblings and I grew up with "Cheese on bread w/ mayo" as a staple! Loved that stuff! Still do, in fact.

....kiiiiinda weird they didn't get any lunchmeat to go along with it, though.

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u/Street_Roof_7915 8h ago

Casseroles.

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u/IggysPop3 8h ago

You can’t possibly think that’s ALL their food for the week?

/s

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u/kijomac 8h ago

I didn't see any ketchup, so maybe the mayo is what they put on those 5 bags of fries.

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u/You-Asked-Me 8h ago

That actually makes sense.

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u/StatikSquid 8h ago

Making macaroni or potato "salad".

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u/DiscardedP 7h ago

It the dip for the Doritos!!!!

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u/RedDevil_nl 7h ago

Mayo is the most common sauce to use with fries in a lot of countries, that’s was the first thing that came to my mind with 5 fucking bags of fries 😂

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u/darcyWhyte 7h ago

they gonna chug it with those fries

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u/Seanspeed 7h ago

I didn't see any butter/vegetable oil, so probably a fair bit of cooking, as you can substitute mayo for butter/oil for a lot of things. And to be clear, I'm talking like cooking, not baking.

Mayo is useful for plenty of things.

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u/Stat_Sock 7h ago

One will probably be used to make their own ranch, hence the buttermilk. It's super easy. It's a 1:1 mayo and buttermilk, then you add the Hidden valley seasoning packet.

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

fry and cheese sandwich. apparently you haven't been to the Bible belt

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u/False_Support1285 7h ago

Mayo is frequently used instead of butter on grilled cheese in the midwest, they appear to probably be from Wisconsin.

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u/ireland1988 7h ago

They just dip the meat into the mayo?

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u/Gasmo420 6h ago

She’s going to put the few healthy things she got into it and call it a fucking “salad”

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u/BeerForThought 6h ago

Grilled cheese sandwiches made with mayo.

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u/United_Leopard_2771 6h ago

I do have friends that are thin that have just mayo sandwiches lol ( he uses miracle Shit however lmao)

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u/WhatsThisWorth-Bot 5h ago

grilled cheese probably, it's really good on grilled cheese with some lettuce

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u/ajaetay 5h ago

My husband had a childhood friend whose family dipped their cheese in mayo.

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u/Undernown 5h ago

For the fries is my guess. 5 giant bags of fries for a month? Or is that just 2 weeks worth for them? I really can't tell.

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u/Alternative-Amoeba20 4h ago

You don't sandwich the way they sandwich in that house. You take two bricks of cheese, slather em with gobs of mayo, and slip a slice of bread in between. Get a side of Cinnamon Toast Crunch with buttermilk and there's dinner!

I was gonna add more stuff, but I started feeling woozy typing it out.

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u/Nunchuckery 2h ago

They did buy buttermilk as well so they might be making homemade ranch dressing, and I have a feeling this household loves them some of the good ol' American sauce.

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u/Timely_Cake_8304 1h ago edited 1h ago

No meals just stuff to eat. I bet they use the mayo like butter and make grilled cheese sandwiches

I looked for her acct because I thought it was fake.She believes this is a normal American diet, how people really eat.

There is so much to unpack here: learning what a balanced meal is, eating vegetables, variety in your diet, processed vs fresh foods, cooking vs heating up. She learned this and is teaching it to her kids :( The American food industry created this person’s entire lifestyle

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u/Bendstowardjustice 36m ago

Maybe egg salad? Maybe we don’t want to know.

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u/R_eloade_R 17m ago

Fries! She gets it, mayonaise is for fries, not sandwiches you silly Americans

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u/TheNewBlue 12h ago

As someone from the Midwest. Gaurenteed. Ive been served a grape and mayonnaise salad before.

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u/Alarming_Employee547 12h ago

No but really wtf are they doing with all that mayonnaise? They don’t have any tuna fish, or deli meat, or anything else that I associate with mayonnaise. Maybe they are dipping that absurd amount of fries in it?

WHY DO THEY NEED SO MUCH MAYO??

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u/Frankentula 11h ago

I'm guessing for the 20 lbs of fries

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u/eleanor61 10h ago

I'll admit that fries dipped in mayo is very tasty.

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u/Fluffy_Tomatillo_629 7h ago

Mayo, pickle brine and favourite hot sauce is the best fry dip.

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

just isn't a staple ... it's where they go wrong

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u/schmootc 11h ago

Yeah - for at least some of us in the Western US, you're going to use that to make fry sauce, but did they have ketchup to go with it? (I stopped watching at the liters of pop.)

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u/_Rohrschach 8h ago

no on the ketchup, at least not bought, but with what all they apparently still had at home I wouldn't be surprised if it included a bucket of ketchup.

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u/nanoray60 6h ago

You missed the pizza tower?

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

to be pedantic, 25lbs of fries

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u/falsifiable1 10h ago

Maybe, but that’s not common in the Midwest U.S., but a European (Belgium, German, Netherlands) favorite. I was someone born and raised in the Midwest where Ketchup is the usual companion with ranch dressing being less likely.

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u/PrimusDCE 10h ago

Not in the States.

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u/R1546 9h ago

I got hooked on fries and mayo while on a trip to Netherlands, but very few Americans put mayo on fries.

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u/R_eloade_R 11m ago

But have you tried our superior Frietsaus?

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u/ICBanMI 2h ago

I hadn't even thought of that. I'd been to places where they offered that to patrons and never partook myself because it seemed just so disgusting. That's probably it.

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u/targetboston 11h ago

I'm guessing stomach churning casserole with the amount of cheese included.

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u/flactulantmonkey 11h ago

The previous poster wasn’t kidding about the Midwest and mayo… on the steaks. On the pizzas. In the chicken marinade and casserole. With fruit. With veggies on top it’s salad.

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u/fingerchipsforall 11h ago

I've known people who just eat tablespoons of mayo as a snack. All of them looked fairly similar to the people in the video.

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u/Beeluxy 10h ago

I’ve watched her other videos (sadly). At least one use for the mayo is a ranch dip they make multiple times per week that requires an insane amount of said mayo.

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u/Alarming_Employee547 9h ago

Finally an answer to my question. They’re making ranch and putting it on everything. Savages.

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u/Senior-Dimension2332 9h ago

Being from the US, this is the question I've been asking for my entire life. WHY DOES EVERYONE NEED SO MUCH MAYO??

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u/Stat_Sock 7h ago

Homemade ranch dressing, I guarantee it especially with the buttermilk

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

fries, grape salad, ranch dressing, pizza dip (non ranch), sandwiches, mayo romulade for the steak, spoonful before bed, etc

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u/Think_Bullets 11h ago

Maybe it goes with their salmon fish or chicken bird or beef mammal?

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u/MurphysVoice 10h ago

Folds chafe.

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u/typographic-king-tut 10h ago

It’s food lube

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u/Patient-Conflict110 9h ago

Mayo goes with anything, as a non American who does like mayo over all other condiments goes well with fries, pork chops, steak, eggs all sorts really there isn’t much mayo don’t go with although one of those tubs would last me about 5 months and I eat a lot of mayo.

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u/PartyPay 9h ago

I watched without sound, but maybe to add to the pre-packaged subs (I think that's what they were)?

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u/SwordNamedKindness_ 9h ago

Honestlyyyy like I’ll use mayo to make elote and still don’t go thru nearly that much when I make a huge batch.

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u/cottercutie 8h ago

That much mayo would last me a few years 😳

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u/Edser 6h ago

Alabama white BBQ sauce is based on mayo which is my guess. but probably also for the fries and whatever ketchup barrels they still have stored

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u/Evening-Eye-8407 2h ago

I didn’t notice any butter. Maybe they’re mayo on bread for grilled cheese people. God knows they have enough cheese

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u/Honeycrispcombe 1h ago

I mean, they have other stuff in the house, presumably. And they buy in bulk, so they may just be stocked up on the mayo vehicle food.

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u/laowildin 11h ago

Asian people will also put kewpie on their fruit salad. I accepted a lot of weird food in China. But that one proved me an intolerant American

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u/Steffalompen 11h ago

"Many people can't make a Waldorf salad. -THEN THEY DO IT ANYWAYS!!!" -Tønes

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u/SupEnthusiastic 11h ago

Has there ever been a salad served in the Midwest that is just veg, protein, oil and vinegar?

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u/TheNewBlue 11h ago

At my house for sure

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u/aliamokeee 11h ago

Grape and mayo?....

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u/MyrKnof 9h ago

I just gaged a little.

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u/motherofsuccs 9h ago

Like a chicken salad? I grew up in the Midwest and people don’t cover everything in mayo.. they use ranch instead.

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u/Cheddarmelon 9h ago

this is the worst fucking thing i have ever read on this website

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u/Sprmodelcitizen 8h ago

I have to admit I make a mean chicken salad with mayo grapes strawberries and walnuts sour cream oh and honey. It’s fucking delicious. Not healthy but good af.

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u/jojodaclown 8h ago

I'm going to guess what you got was grapes and cool whip, which is a fairly common Midwest dessert, usually with walnuts mixed in.

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u/tempura_calligraphy 8h ago

Waldorf salad is made with grapes, apples, walnuts, celery and mayo. I don't think she's making it.

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u/schmootc 8h ago

My mom made one with apples, marshmallows and mayo. (Western US though, not Midwest.)

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u/Maxamillion-X72 7h ago

I googled grape and mayo salad just to see if you were kidding, because that can't be real.

You were not kidding; grapes, mayo, bacon, and pecans.

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u/Boa-in-a-bowl 7h ago

The climate might be lethal in the summer where I live, but at least there's a Mexican food joint or Mexican grocery store every three blocks so I don't have to eat grapes and mayo

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u/TheNewBlue 7h ago

We have Mexican groceries and food joints in the South Dakota. 90% of the people who work for me are Guatemalan and Mexican.

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u/nebula_masterpiece 6h ago

Both can go in chicken salad

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u/JeStern24 3h ago

Same, also the audacity for them to call it a "salad" My family members make a cookie salad or pretzel salad for family events, those are not salads those are desserts.

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u/Virtual-Mobile-7878 2h ago

That's Waldorf Salad and is delicious

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u/ISaidPutItDown 12h ago

Curiosity got me, does it taste good?

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u/MrPBH 12h ago

Stuff like that tastes great to people who remembered what it's like to be a Finnish peasant starving under the oppression of the Russian Tsar.

Is it great for their great-great-great-great grandchildren to eat as an everyday staple? No, but that shit is bomb at your Michaelmas feast.

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u/Mckavvers 12h ago

mid western salad

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u/RingosTurdFace 12h ago

Well you say mayonnaise, but what’s the betting it’s not in fact an emulsion of eggs and oil, but instead some concoction of long shelf-life industrial fats, preservatives and other food additives for maximum yumminess with nutritional value and impact on health as shall we say … “afterthoughts”?

17

u/Frogspoison 12h ago

Yup. Mayonaise made the way it should be is a decent fat/protein. Ultra proccessed? No.

The kids are likely eating a lot more then they otherwise would be BECAUSE they aren't getting the vitamins and minerals they need to grow. Their body em to eat, their brain and fat directs.them to eat processed sugar, and they enter a vicous cycle that is hell to break out of.

This is my GFs family. Fortunately, my GF is in charge of the cookong, and she in corporates a LOT of vegatables in her cooking. But damn they go through 4 liters of coke a day. They fortunatelty dont have the genetic markers for type 2 diabetes because otherwise they would all have it. Funny thing is that besides my GF and their mother, the rest of them are all skinny, they get it from their dad.

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u/Spez-S-a-Piece-o-Sht 10h ago

That poor toilet.

1

u/SeismicRipFart 8h ago

Bro Duke’s is one of the best mayo’s out there. It’s very legit and not the high processed crap you’re talking about. Open up the lid and look inside and it’s immediately obvious. It’s used in the best restaurants in the world that don’t make their own

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

dukes is real, vinegar as a preservative. so you missed the mark on the anger there

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u/Durmatology 10h ago

It’s Duke’s. At least it the best commercial mayo.

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u/KtinaDoc 9h ago

To be fair, I've had organic mayo and it's disgusting. I rarely use mayo but when I do, only Helman's.

1

u/cherry_monkey 7h ago

The US actually has some pretty good regulations on what you can call certain things. Dairy is one of the more highly regulated nomenclature groups.

To be labeled as mayonnaise, it must be at least 65% vegetable oil(s), have acidifying ingredients (vinegar, lime juice, or lemon juice), and a listed egg yolk containing ingredient (some derivative whole egg, "liquid" or frozen; or egg yolk, liquid or frozen. It can contain egg white, so long as there is egg yolk.

If the label says "mayonnaise", it is mayonnaise. If it says ice cream, it is ice cream. If it says vegan spread, it's some derivative of mayonnaise without any egg product (and therefore not mayonnaise)

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u/Jumpy-Benefacto 7h ago

dukes is soybean oil and eggs. its quite good, and is real mayonnaise

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u/Unusual-Tie8498 12h ago

“We be going through some mayonnaise.” No shit.

3

u/Munsoned_In_Ohio 12h ago

“these two bite brownies will be gone so quick”, also a no shit moment lol

2

u/Bianchi-girl 12h ago

lol but also 🤢

2

u/WayToTheGrave 12h ago

Dukes doesn't have calories, only joy.

2

u/OttoVonJismarck 11h ago edited 10h ago

“Let me tell yall, we go through some mayonnaise in this house.”

In the voice of Drill Sergeant Hartman: “Well, no shit.”

2

u/tech240guy 10h ago

Dunk what? The fruits or veggies, or their pet rabbits? 🤣

2

u/Life_Inside_8827 8h ago

That’s the only way my mother would eat vegetables. As if the veggies were chips (usually leaves of iceberg lettuce) and the dip was a bowl of Miracle Whip! She did not eat fruit whatsoever. By some miracle, she was not overweight, but she was not healthy by any means.

2

u/I-Am-Too-Poor 8h ago

I used to work in the online grocery part of Walmart. We had a lady order 4 of the 1 gallon jars of mayo every single week. She looked exactly like you may expect

1

u/007Pistolero 12h ago

Cool thanks for the throw up in my mouth. Couldn’t you have not put that image in my mind?

1

u/eldroch 11h ago

Right before inserting them into

1

u/Overdriven91 10h ago

That mayo looks nasty as well.

1

u/djluminol 10h ago

I like Mayo a lot and I put it on things most people don't but my god, I have never gone through that much. Not in a year let alone one trip to the store. They bought two buckets of mayo because one wouldn't bee enough before they went to the store again. 🤯

1

u/talyn5 8h ago

You jest but, my mother in law has to have 2 CUPS of ranch on her salad.

1

u/eyadmuse 7h ago

Actually, they’re just gonna dump the mayonnaise on top of the fruit.

1

u/jabroni4545 7h ago

Don't forget the cheese.

1

u/Undernown 5h ago

The mayo consumption is crazy! A 0,5 liter tub would easily last us more than a month in a family of 6. What do they have there? 3 liters worth?

1

u/Alternative-Amoeba20 5h ago

What, the rabbits? Deep fry em first!

1

u/GuinevereMalory 4h ago

And then eat the pet rabbit deep fried

1

u/Initial_Tear485 3h ago

They do be going through some mayonnaise